• ipotty
  • spnkix-motorized-shoes
  • Apocalypse-Tactical-Tomahawk
  • batman-knife
  • Bear-Grylls-Ultimate-Survival-Kit
  • Tactical-Canned-Bacon

Zombie Head Cookie Jar

Tired of the zombie takeover and the wholesale indiscriminate eating of brains? Get your long-awaited revenge with this zombie headed cookie jar. Go ahead. Rip off the “skull” and dig in. Coooooooookies!

29.99

via Amazon

Do you really know what animates the undead and turns them into human hunting eaters of people flesh? Some say it’s witchcraft or voodoo. Others are certain it’s either a government conspiracy or some scientific experiment gone terribly awry. Or maybe it’s a burst of radiation from outer space or a virus brought to earth on a meteor that infests the newly deceased.

None of the above as this dead-like zombie headed cookie jar proves. It’s cookies! Or maybe it’s Halloween candy if that seems more appropriate. Any snack that can fit in this 9-inch ceramic vision of grotesque zombie-ness will do. Just pull off the lid and feast on the “brains” within.

The green googlie eyed face and the pink brain matter framed by mussed black hair is the perfect place to hide your stash of Twizzlers or baby Mounds bars from prying eyes and hands. Children and adults could be scared out of their cookies if they are kept in this monument to the morbid.

Have you ever noticed how you never see any zombies at a graveyard? Word is that it’s too late to become animated after the burial, so a graveyard is just a lot of dead space. But, then again, there aren’t any Hershey’s Kisses there, either. Coincidence?

So if you find yourself not feeling right, sort of like you’re not human anymore. If you are feeling an insatiable hunger, don’t just shamble about with your arms outstretched. Head for the zombie cookie jar for a quick cure. If it’s empty, just radio your nearest 911 operator and tell them to Send More Cookies.